Kent Wayne

Musings

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by

DirtySciFiBuddha
in

I suspect there’s a difference between negativity that naturally arises, without any prompting or deliberation, and negativity that arises through willful focus.

I suspect natural negativity is meant to be internally felt and allowed, if not externally expressed (if we always expressed it externally, it could destroy relationships or send us to prison). And, once internally felt and allowed, I believe it naturally leaves on its own (that’s my experience, anyway).

Deliberately focusing on negativity (willfully focusing on it when it doesn’t naturally arise) seems to prolong or amplify it. That’s my experience, and it seems to be implied by studies on venting.

So I try to just let it exist and be felt. Then it flows and goes all on its own.

Comments

4 responses to “Musings”

  1. T. W. Dittmer Avatar
    T. W. Dittmer

    Thoughtful, Kent.

    Reply
  2. meganblack82 Avatar
    meganblack82

    I think that’s an excellent observation. Negativity always tends to arise but it’s what we choose to do with it that matters. I read in a Stephen King novel once a really cool premise that when God decides to fix a problem, it’s often not gentle and graceful but like popping a giant pimple. He just squeezes the heck out of it until it erupts, letting the mess fall where it may and eventually settle where it ought. And although it’s a work of fiction, I think it’s a pretty apt description of life. And I think that we are probably wired in much the same way. Things affect us and eventually the emotions erupt. But ultimately we can choose the actions that we use to express it. Will I slather on a little makeup and go out dancing, or pop that darn thing and hope it looks better by the morning, lol. Either way though I do believe that what we focus on most we unintentionally make more of and figuring out how to vent it and then let it go is probably one of the hardest and most important things we deal with in life.

    Reply
    1. DirtySciFiBuddha Avatar
      DirtySciFiBuddha

      It’s pretty tough! My method is this: If I can switch to unforced positivity, that’s great. But often that doesn’t work. In that case, if I can switch to unforced neutrality, that’s great. But often that doesn’t work. In that case, I’ll let the negativity be, arise when it wants to and experience as it is, so I can process it and let it go. The one thing I don’t do in that state is speak on it or act on it. I feel it’s fine to speak or act on negativity when I’m not feeling negative, as strange as that sounds. I can make talking shit into a lighthearted fun joke session, as opposed to being venomous and mean. I try not to outwardly give shape to negativity when I’m negatively charged, in other words. I just try to let it be and let it process.

      Reply
  3. Zeal4living Avatar
    Zeal4living

    Staring at yourself in a mirror can also help to dissolve negativity.

    Reply

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